Monday Motivation | How To Get Over a Breakup

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Yuck, we’ve all been there. Whether you were dating for 2 months, or 2 years — breakups are tough! Especially, when you give your all and develop a routine together. Treating yourself well during the post-breakup is a must, and you will certainly get through this. (I promise you!) While there’s no magical formula (besides time) to mend your broken heart — having healthy coping mechanisms are an absolute must to a faster recovery. An interesting article I found recently stated that when we experience a breakup, our minds automatically revert to those feel-good moments of falling in love all over again. (Doesn’t make our life easier, right?) Personally: I can totally vouch for this! I was quick to pick up those rose-colored-glasses post breakup. In reality, those moments were truly negative, and toxic — and only leading us in manic circles. To help mend that beautiful heart — I’m sharing some personal-approved strategies to happiness. Independent ladies, you got this! XX


I’m going to be honest — I absolutely hated when people told me this! That’s not making anything better right now, you know! I guarantee you’re going to look back at this relationship in a few months time, and feel so much better. Confession: I googled ‘can you die of a broken heart’ — clearly, I was struggling! I can finally look back at that relationship today and say, everything happens for a reason. I learned so much from it, and have happily moved on.


It probably seems impossible, but I’m here to tell you — it’s not! Spying on your ex will only make things worse. (Easier said then done, I know) When you continue to talk to someone you love, your body will only crave it more. You know that saying, ‘you want what you can’t have’ — This is the perfect example. Delete the number, block on social media channels, and delete his g-chat! Spying on your ex will undoubtedly make things worse. I know this is hard, but it’s for your own good! Delete, delete, delete!


This is the perfect opportunity to get that butt in shape! Use your ex-relationship as ammo to get in the best shape of your life! Don’t do this excessively, of course — everything in moderation. PS: All I wanted to do was sit around, cry, and feel sorry for myself. This will not speed up recovery, so get moving! There are so many fun fitness classes to try. Workouts don’t have to be boring, and dreadful.


Sometimes, we just need a change of scenery. Unfortunately, everything you pass will spark some kind of memory. (I kid you not — I couldn’t even eat a slice of pizza without thinking of my ex). The key to this one is time. When you’re feeling a little better, book the trip. Feeling like shit the entire time will not make your getaway enjoyable. Womp.


Seriously, you guys, bubble-baths are life. If you need to cry, do it with bubbles on your side. I highly recommend a glass of wine, relaxing music and plenty of candles. Cleanse the negative energy away — ain’t nobody got time for that!


I’m a nerd, but I truly believe in the saying, ‘everything happens for a reason’ — You’re not going to see this now, no. But later on, you’re going to understand why it didn’t workout. Fast forward 5 years later, and I’m happily moved on. I learned the hard way, but applied those lessons to this relationship. I’m grateful for the roller coaster ride, because I can appreciate my boyfriend so much more. Some relationships are night/day from one another — and, that was the case with me. I’m not saying that your ex is a bad person, but once your heart heals, you’ll start seeing a bit clearly again. Things will make sense eventually — just not today.


Ah, this is a biggie. ‘I should have done this, and I should have done that’ — Enough! It takes 2 to tango. It’s not your fault, and you owe it to yourself to be authentic. Never settle, and never change for someone else. There’s only one of you in this world, embrace it.


I don’t care what anyone says, you seriously cannot be friends! Well, at least not now. I’m a firm believer that you can be friendly down the line. You need to let your heart heal before you hangout/talk again. Feelings don’t go away overnight — this will only make your heart fall in a deeper hole. Regardless, you’re going to be let down either way.


This is your chance to get out, and have the time of your life. You are so loved, with an exciting future ahead! Dance, drink champagne, and have as many girls/guys nights as you possibly can! You’re going to get through this, just trust the timing of your life. XX

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  • Hi Arin! I’ve been reading your blog for sometime now, but don’t comment as often as I should. This post could not have come at a better time. I was in an 8 year relationship that ended in December and even though it’s now May, I’m still struggling a little, but time is helping to make things a little easier day by day. Thank you for your words of encouragement and keep up the great posts! Thanks again! 🙂


    • Hi Hillary! Thank you SO much for the comment! I’m so glad it helped (even just a little!) — I’ve been in your shoes, and it’s not fun. In time, my love! And you’ll be better than ever! Trust the plan 🙂 XX